I felt misunderstood and I really hate that. Perception was instilled simply with your choice of words. Thats why I say, words are as dangerous as they erase whats beneath conveniently and paint a whole new coat on top. In my entire life, feeling misunderstood isn't anything new and i do not see the reason to explain (perhaps just lazy). But its just getting sick and tired...

The most frequent song on my playlist. Love it, enjoy :)

Indeed, it had been an extremely tough week for me. People who knows me well enough knows that Pearl was my life, my everything. I lived this week with emptiness and sorrow.

Today, Pearly's ashes were freed to the sea. I've leashed her for 14 years 6 months, its time i let her go. Its time she regained her freedom. She had been strong for me, going through a year of medication and going through the many escapes from death for me. Its time i be strong for her and let her go...


"Darling, you have been the best companion and the best thing that happened to my life. You brought me happiness and I wish I did too. You be a strong girl and continue your journey. Though you are gone, you remain in my heart and the memories will never be forgotten. I miss you badly and u know i love you still even if you are gone."

Love, Mummy.

Avoided coming back home early to an empty house, full of Pearl's stuffs, scent and images. Everything but her. I just got home, parents were sleeping and lights were out. As like usual, i was careful to be sure not to step on Pearl.

What was i even thinking?

There is a before and after for everything. Life is before death and we Buddhism believed there is life after death as well. But I often wonder, what’s before life then? We believe in religions to prepare ourselves well so that the uncertain may seemingly be clear to us.

Like a composition, our lives are set out with an introduction, the body, the ending or so to speak, the conclusion. The similarities between the two? Is that how we came into this world is how we are going to end up leaving it. Alone and with nothing.

It is hard to describe what I am feeling now. The thoughts about losing you are not just words that could define, it cannot be written and it can only be felt. Ive always thought that you are too dependent on me and needs me around all the time. But I come to realize, it is probably the other way round. I need you more than you needed me. You are the heart of my very soul and I have come to a point in my life knowing that I can't quite live without you.

Weekend was great. Why? Simply because i love wine and dine. *grins*

We had planned to visit Forlino on Friday night but they were extorting a minimum spending of $500 taking advantage of the F1 weekend. So we decided on Procacci which was an excellent decision. Later in the night, we met up with the girls at The Wine Company for some wine and chill out gossiping sessions and ended Friday at 1am.

Its nice waking up early on Saturday for brunch. Met my ex boss who is visiting SG and my ex colleagues at Jones the grocer. Hearty breakkie to start the day is definitely the right way. Great catchup nevertheless! Met Morgan and Maurice whos helping the local nose on some wine tasting session at Jones too. Uncle still looks the same and promise to catch up when im back. :)

Enough said, photos of Procacci to justify the awesome alfresco dinner.







Truffle Potato Soup


Parma Ham & Baffalo Mozzarella Cheese


Carbonara - The simplest dish but very well done


Spicy Cappellini - Love this, very good!


My favourite Panna Cotta


Generous serving of traditional italian dessert, Tiramisu



Yummylicious! Looking forward to Forlino when im back. Tonight is London... i should be excited but im not. Whats happening!?!?

The recent interview of MM Lee talking about his wife’s illness is harder on him than the stress he faced during his years in politics really touched my heart. He shared that his most difficult moment is at the end of each day as he sits by the bedside of his wife who has been unable to move or speak for more than two years. Nevertheless, he stills talk to his wife about his daily happenings and reading out her favorite poems religiously every night. He said:

“She understands when I talk to her, which I do every night,” he said. “She keeps awake for me; I tell her about my day’s work, read her favourite poems.”

“I told her, ‘I would try and keep you company for as long as I can,” before adding, “I’m not sure who’s going first, whether she or me.”

Isn't this touching? Both of them have celebrated their diamond anniversary of 61 years. Still, he cared for her the same over the years with no complains. Honestly, who would be like this nowadays? I could almost be sure that it is close to none.

I remember an article from their daughter Dr Lee Wei Ling on sunday times talking about their love for each other. MM Lee's commitment towards taking care of his wife is of great admiration. He measures her blood pressure several times a day. One day, the doctor invented a blood pressure measuring tool that is worn like a watch for Mrs Lee. However, the very next day, Mrs Lee told the doctor she prefers to have her husband measure her blood pressure. :) Its a subtle request to feel the love and concern from her husband.

Such remarkable relationship. Love at first sight is romantic but may not hold a candle to love that lasts a lifetime & is for better or for worse. Commitment is definitely a key variable to sustaining such relationships.

Hopefully things will turn for the better for them.

I like HK generally and don’t mind going every year. I have been quite lucky to be able to do so till date. Be it work or own holidays. This time round, it is a rainy HK with typhoon one going on but I like it better then the hot and humid summer last August. It was unbearable.

My new HK colleagues are really nice and the brand is doing well in their market. It’s a relief to know that compared to the depressing situation in Singapore. Training was relatively relax and the last day ended early. Had lunch with my colleagues and head straight to central to try my luck on an earlier flight, which I managed to. Even so, I still have time for a quick manicure and some shopping heehee…



Oh man… ive been dreading work since morning. Shouldn’t I be feeling motivated rather then dreadful? Sigh…

Today we went to the temple to visit grandpa. I felt a sudden pang of guilt, as it has been a while since I visited him. I missed him dearly still nevertheless. In fact quite frequently. Though grandpa has left us for 2 years but I still have a vivid recollection of him.

I often wonder how is his side of heaven? I hope he is doing well or rather i hope he has attained Nirvana. In the mean time, I'll still see you in my dreams, wandering, happy and living in that little heaven I've built for you in my head. 
I hope you like it there.

Grandma and Pearl hasn’t been feeling well, bless them well grandpa.

I miss you.

It ended extremely satisfying. I enjoyed myself thoroughly. A simple but very intriguing night ;)
Let the pictures do the talking...

Dinner was @ Stella, love the ambience.




The view looking out from our table.






Lets start with Salad. Grilled chicken is sooo gooood!


How can we forget?


My wagyu ribeye ;)


By the time the main was served, the night unfolds..


Dinner ended and we had planned to head up to the bar 'Altitude' just upstairs for drinks but the place seemed incomplete and not exactly conducive..


Decided to go to fullerton bay hotel for drinks but damn it was fully booked.


Finally, we popped by to customs house just next to it and settled at a cuba bar.


Lychee mojito blend




Head back home and cuts the cake at 12am sharp :) Just look at donut that glutton girl!


A little disappointed Pearl couldnt join..


After all of these, i was quite impressed that i could still whack 5 of my favourite otah LOL Satisfying!!!

And now? Its diet week...

I once believed that in this life, we're all different. Some do their best yet never getting rewarded while others do the bare minimum and get what they don't deserve. It's pretty much a contradiction you don't want to land yourself in. Then again, it's not like anyone had a choice. At the end of the day, people are selfish and nature is nothing but coincidental.

I cannot say exactly if Day 2 is any better than Day 1. With a 2 hours handover, it sure sounds like the handover was completed. I was appalled at how handovers could be done in such a hasty and perfunctory manner. Now that I look back, I think I did a darn good one. LOL

The entire system and procedure seemed to be quite disorganized and relatively backdated but then again it is a small division, which I remind myself that I should not be making comparison. On the brighter side, there is one huge consolation where there is this benevolent looking pantry aunty that makes coffee for us every morning. And she cooks desserts for us every Monday & Wednesday. ☺ Nice. So ill make sure ill do my sales only on Tues and Thurs LOL

Complaining a little bit more. I would very much prefer to learn how to find data then depending on people. I have to admit I’m quite impatient and when I need something, I would really like to have it asap.. perhaps now? Haha So, business reports and analysis is done by someone else and shes pregnant and grumpy and I just find it difficult to get things from her at the thought of that grumpy face. -.-

So tonight, I will convince myself that tomorrow will be a better day :)
Good night my friends.

August is the birthday month! The month I love best!

Year after year and it is the same resolution set, the same kind of celebration, a more selective group of friends for get-togethers and if you realized, lesser things to be happy about. I guess it is part of growing up where one no longer is contented or happy with little things.

As you get older, the more things you experience and happiness is less imminent to the things you thought that once meant the world to you.

Similarly, birthday celebrations seemed to be less important in the recent years. All I’m asking for is to end the day smooth and sail with a smile. Wake up the next morning still feeling happy and good.

Nevertheless, Happy Birthday to all August babies ☺

It is my first time to Cameron and it turned out to be quite nice except for the long journey. With peripheral vertigo since young, this really made the journey less enjoyable. The trip is supposed to be rejuvenating for me to start the week fresh but somehow the journey just made it otherwise.

Fortunately, the hotel is perfect and compensates for that. Pictures are loaded up on FB and of course for the privileged few ;)






On a different note, I think I found my sunglass that I have been searching for since my previous one mysteriously went missing after the turkey trip last year. On normal circumstances, I would resign to fate that it is gods will that I probably need a new item. But for sunglass, NOOO!!!!! It is so damn hard to get the right fit of shade to compliment my big slab of face! Arggg…

I loved the Tods shades but today I went to try it and it looks like shit on me. So this is out. But isn’t this nice?


Anyhow, I spotted another one that I like and suits me a little better. Tom Ford heehee


But I have to admit it is not the perfect one. Hmm…

I was really dreading the team building but luckily, it turned out to be great fun. Went to Bollywood Veg Farm at Kranji and this is the Dill i planted myself. To be honest, I'm not exactly a plant or flowers person so the venue was really just so-so. It just feels weird that these strangers will soon be my colleagues.

Backposting on the event last Saturday. Rise and shine extremely early for the weekend is unusual for me. Met the girls at 9am at Riders Cafe for breakfast and I'm proud to say i reached at 9.10am LOL

Afterwhich, we went shopping followed by some pampering session of mani and pedi. Nice.

Too short for my liking and it seems like an even busier week than when I was working. Insanely true.

Just this Monday that passed, I tried to finish all my errands so I can keep the entire week free for myself. So I went for my pre-employment check up and my follow-up that was way expired since Sept last year.

Yesterday was relatively busy too. Rise early to fetch gram and aunt to the market and was at their place practically the entire day. Headed down to Bellini at 11pm for the party. Yes, on a Tuesday -.-

Finally today I had some time to myself. Met Tun for lunch and Jess for coffee in town. Shopped around and got myself a pair of heels at pedder red! Sat at cream bistro blogging accompanied with a mug of thirst quenching beer and a basket of French fries. Isn’t life great to be able to have a beer in the afternoon?

Tomorrow is going to be another R&R day. I’m not going to sleep in late like I usually would. I’m gonna be up early to gain a few more hours for the day. It is Pearl’s turn for her medical check up. Its grocery shopping in the afternoon as im cooking dinner! It will be a quiet, relax and scrumptious (I hope) dinner with a bottle of red wine to complete the meal.

If only time stops now…. Im really enjoying the no work days.

It’s Friday again in just a blink! Time moves too quickly during happy times.

Today I lug my final bag of belongings from the office and all of a sudden my desk looks relatively neat and empty. Now, my room is filled with IWC bags that I am too lazy to unpack.

I officially announce that I am on my switch off mode… because... my holidays are starting tomorrow!!! Woo hoo!! I am in such exuberant spirits ☺ I am looking at the one-week break I have and it is just not sufficient. If only… if only I could have a month… sigh

Lately have been weeks of farewell lunches and I’m piling on fats so conveniently like I slip on my clothes. Damn. Anyhow, it is like the thousandth time I am hearing things about my new boss. The first reaction so far I received were the frightened and worried face on them and the second thing that comes along was: ”Wah you heard about XX’s stories right?” LOL Even uncle Larry told Jenny that he is worried for little Vivian. So cute, this larry.

But in utmost honesty, I am quite pleased with myself that I wasn’t sublimely perturbed at all hearing the same comments from different people. I do not want to be judgmental about someone based on comments but rather to judge him/her myself. Of course I do not deny that there are endless questions. If it were being laid out, it’d be boundless although I must say I have come to terms with a lot more things as I age. Slowly but surely.

In any case, I see that being pessimistic always helps in most situations. For me, that is. I would not be optimistic about situations and very often; I end up receiving the worst disappointments. No expectations, no disappointment. Simple as that.

On a happier note, I am really looking forward to my long awaited break. Even if it means just lazing at home. Thing is, one week is too short and I need to run my errands, do my checkup, read about the new brand, make some notes, finish my book, bring my grandma and aunt out, bring pearl for her checkup etc. Not exactly a break eh? !@#$%